Observations in three acts

I.

I have met only one person in Africa–though I’ve only been to four countries–who is, as a rule, early. But I’ve found the one place where gaggles of people will arrive far ahead of time: the bus station on the Kigali-Kampala route. For good reason: that bus, somehow, leaves early. Early. In Africa.

II.

I have found the place where that same gaggle, or any other really, moves like New Yorkers: Immigration posts. Pushing, shoving, cutting in line, thrusting hands over shoulders and between elbows just to get your passport through the window before the guy who is, legitimately, in front of you. Only to stand around and wait, for an hour and a half, for the bus to be inspected.

III.

And I have found the country of remarkable slogans. I don’t know what’s in the air, or the water, or the curriculum in Uganda, but their advertising begs for a roll of the eyes. “Peacock: The Painter’s Paint!” or “Nice Clear Pens: CLEARLY the right choice!” (I suppose it’s better than “the write choice”?) But my favorite is: “BANDAG: Only Bandag is Bandag.”

That’s right. You heard it here first.